The Engagement Story
By Bryan Stiles
Once I figured out that I wanted to marry Laurel I found myself in a precarious position. I was the one who was lagging in the relationship. Or at least I was almost positive that I was the one we were waiting on and that Laurel was just hoping I would want to marry her and was just biding her time. So I decided that it was a perfect set up for me to propose old school. Meaning that we wouldn’t have the pre-marriage discussion where we decided to get married and then go ring shopping and then after everyone already knows you propose. So I decided that I would buy a ring myself, and do it all without her having any clue. This turned out to be slightly difficult and somewhat stressful even. But I managed it like a champ.
So first I had to go ring shopping which means I had to find some times where I wasn’t with her to get away and check out some rings. Melanie had also called me the week before to tell me that she knew a jeweler that could get me a pretty good deal on a ring and diamonds. She sent me the website for the guy and it only took me a minute of looking at the pictures to find a ring that I really liked. Still I decided it would be wise to look around a bit to see what the market was like. The first thing I did was talk to Mena and have her come with me to a jewelry store. She knows two things really well. Me and diamonds. So it was probably a good thing to have her come with me. We went to Schubach’s and looked at all there rings. I learned all the diamond lingo at this visit. I had to make sure to not let my newfound knowledge of diamonds come out in front of Laurel. I almost slipped once when Laurel was looking at one of her rings and she mentioned that it was dirty. I told her that a jeweler could clean it up real quick and that I could get it done for her on the way home from work one day. Then I realized that I might have just given away the fact that I had been going to jewelry stores. But she didn’t really suspect anything. I think she just liked the idea of me going to a ring store.
I found a ring I kind of liked at Schubach’s but I had a huge headache by the end of it. So I put it on hold and waited for another day. The next day I stopped by Wilson’s diamonds and checked out all the rings there. They had the biggest selection of rings. In fact that’s all they sell there. Which I find kind of funny, I mean, people only buy their engagement rings once. Not much return business. I guess they can profit from specialization and give cheaper prices that way. Referrals are probably decent too. Anyway, they had a few styles I thought were alright, but nothing didn’t really jump out at me. I found a men’s ring that I like though. Around then I started to realize that I didn’t like the one from Schubach’s. In fact now in retrospect, I don’t really like it at all, it is kind of hideous. But after looking at a billion different rings I guess I was a little sparkle overloaded.
During this time I got Laurel’s roommate Emily to be my mole. She did some spy work for me to see if Laurel really was ready to get married and any other inside information that I needed. This was helpful because Laurel was really starting to freak out about where she was going to live in the fall. I was dragging my feet because I didn’t want her to get a year contract. I didn’t have an apartment either, but all this I was trying to postpone until we were engaged. This also led me to freak out a ton because I was trying to orchestrate everything and hold her off from doing anything final. It was rather stressful and I was a basket case while at work. Luckily I held it all in while I was around Laurel.
This all started to come to a head the week before I had the ring ready. She found a house that she really liked and really wanted to get it. She kept trying to ask me if it she should get it or what she should do. I couldn’t really give her a straight answer. Along our discussions she asked me if I was going to break up with her and she would be locked in with a yearlong contract. I told her that she was stuck with me. That made her start thinking about where our relationship was going. So it was on her mind all day at work and the next day too. That Friday we went to Costco with Emily and I could tell that there was something on her mind. I was pretty sure that it was about marriage. When we were at the store she finally brought it up. She asked “So are you kinda thinking about marrying me?” I freaked out in my head at that time, but I think my face was just blank at the time. So after all pistons were firing and a full tank of mental NOS was used up I came up with an answer. It was “kinda?” Her spirit just dropped there. It was sooo sad. It was like all happiness had left her.
The next day I drove up to Bountiful to see the jeweler, pick a diamond and have it set. I made a down payment and he told me it would be ready on Tuesday. On the way home I called her dad to ask if I could marry her. It turned out to be a rather short conversation. In fact he didn’t answer when I first called him so I left a message. He called me back when I was in the middle of the drive through at Wendy’s. That was kind of funny. The conversation didn’t last much longer than it took to get through the drive through either. He just told me that they had been waiting for this phone call for a while. After that I headed up to Rock Canyon and met Mark Stewart there. I asked him to take photos for me so we headed up the canyon to scout out the spot. We found a good spot and headed back down. I called Laurel and she asked me if I had been playing Frisbee, I said I had (Straight up lie!) and it was fun.
We went tubing down Provo river that afternoon and I started hinting that we should go on some mini hikes during the week. She said, “Ok!” and I thought, “Well that was simple.” Later that night I texted her roommate Emily while we were all hanging out in her living room and said “I need you to get a ride home from work on Tuesday and then come up with an excuse as to why while I am around.” So she waited a little while and then told Laurel that on Tuesday she was heading over to campus to work on some registration stuff for this fall. Laurel just said “Ok!” and I thought, “Well that was simple.” So everything was set.
Tuesday came around and I was excited. It was a good excitement though. I wasn’t really nervous because everything was set and I wasn’t going to ruin the surprise. Or at least the chances were small due to my impeccable planning skills, which was a nice change from the freakouts a week before. So anyway, I got off work early and drove up to Bountiful to pick up the ring. My check book took a hard hit that afternoon… I got back at about 4:50 and awaited her text saying that she was back from work. 5:00 rolled around and… nothing. 5:10 came along and still nothing so I sent her a text “Are you home yet?” Still no reply. So at 5:20 I was royally impatient. I called her and she finally answered, it turns out she was on the phone with her younger brother. Of all the times!!! She was almost done so I put the ring in my cargo shorts and headed over.
I actually got to talk to her brother on the phone a bit. He’s a funny guy. During our conversation he asked “So you guys are going on a hike huh?” I replied “yeeess?” detecting a little bit of insinuation in his voice. It turns out he knew, and he knew exactly what was going to happen in the next 20 mins. Also about that time I got a text from my friend Mark saying “We should double on Saturday. That was code for “I’ve arrived at the parking lot”. So I replied “Yeah how about 5:35” Which was code for we should get to the parking lot at 5:35.” The code was a good thing because Laurel asked who I was texting and I was able to tell her Mark called to see if we wanted to double on Saturday. She said “tell him sure” and I thought “Well that was easy.” She really had no idea whatsoever on what was going on. We got to the parking lot and I had the ring in my right pocket, so naturally I wanted her to be on my left side just in case she bumped into me or something. It didn’t work out that way. So I had to kind of make sure she didn’t get too close. This meant I had somewhat of a death grip on her hand and was keeping her at a distance. She didn’t really think much of it though since I used to do that when we first started dating. Apparently I was rather nervous at the beginning of our relationship too.
We started up the canyon and apparently I was booking it. I thought we were going the speed of a snail, but I suppose my senses were somewhat heightened at the moment. And yet she still didn’t think much of it because I had mentioned on Saturday that it would be a good way to cross train instead of going running every day. She just assumed that I wanted to keep her heart rate up. Just another bit of universal luck that I used up that night. It was kind of awkward on the way up because since I only had one thing on my mind that I couldn’t talk about, I couldn’t think of anything else to say. But luckily she didn’t really notice anything yet again. As we got close to the spot where I was going to propose and Mark was hiding our code word to signal to Mark that we were there was “Woot!” I worked it into the conversation rather well and it actually turned into both of us saying “Woot woot!” “Woooot.” She still suspected nothing. Then the moment came. We were almost to the turn in where I was going to take her down to the creek alongside the trail and propose on a rather large boulder that the water was flowing around. I summed up my courage to bring her down and then the two guys in front of me turned left to go down there too. My heart skipped not one, not two but probably SEVEN beats and I summoned all my mental force to will them away from the area. A bit more of my universal luck was used up and they turned away. It was like magic. I had stuttered in my steps when they turned in, and Laurel asked “What’s wrong” I just told her I tripped on some rocks, they were slippery, and she agreed. There went a little more luck.
So down we went to hop on to the large boulder where I would pop the question. I went first and she followed. I hopped up onto the boulder and turned around to look Laurel in the eyes and she hopped up on the boulder too. Then she proceeded to hop onto some other rocks and started jumping away to go explore the area. So close! I said “Wait, come back here.” She looked at me kind of funny and came back. I angled her away from where the cameras were and then said “Do you remember on Friday when you asked me if I was thinking about marrying you.” Puzzled by my sudden serious look on my face and slightly apprehensively she said “Yes?” I told her “ Well I wasn’t quite ready yet at that time because…” At this point I leaned over to grab the ring box out of my cargo pockets and started to get down on my knee, “…I didn’t have a ring yet” I opened it up and she gasped and I asked her if she would marry me. She said yes and then pulled that ring right out of the box and put it on. I thought I was supposed to do that, but she wasn’t going to wait.
We were there for a little bit and my friend Mark came out after I told her that it was all being recorded. She had no clue… which is kind of the theme of this proposal. Hopefully it doesn’t turn out to be the theme of the marriage…
After Mark left I took her back to the trail and proceeded to confess all the lies I had told her over the last 3 weeks. It was rather funny, and I think that wraps up the story of how we got engaged.
Laurel’s Side
Let me start off by saying that I love Bryan and I wanted to marry him. But what he was thinking…I had no idea. Complete darkness. Well, except that he loved me too.
I may freak out just a little bit when it comes to housing, but I had never waited this long to start looking. From the vibes I was getting from him I felt that it would be a while until he was sure he wanted to marry me. For all I knew, I was certain he would wake up one day and realize him didn’t want to be with me at all, let alone forever. That being said, I did NOT want to be stuck in a yearlong contract for housing if he was going to leave me. I was going to pack up and leave if that was the case. No use being depressed and dejected and in the same town as him. So you see my dilemma: I needed someplace to live come Fall, but I wanted to know what he thought. So I asked him. Was he going to leave me anytime in the near future? Nope. Apparently I was stuck with him.
Well at least that was somewhat comforting.
I tried to be patient, but I knew I was bugging him about the housing question. Every time I brought it up I felt like he made it seem like it was nothing to worry about and we could deal with it later. I didn’t feel the same. I didn’t want to be stuck in a hole. And despite the bugging, I felt that I had to talk to him about it. So I started looking. I found the cutest house for a good price with rooms available. I called and looked at it and it was perfect for me. Something was wrong though. I just didn’t feel right about it. I felt like I needed more time. I told Bryan on Sunday that I was apprehensive about it—and I’m pretty sure he was thanking his lucky stars—and I decided that I probably wouldn’t even bother sending in my application because so many girls had looked at it.
To make matters worse, on Friday, I finally broke down after a lot of contemplation to ask him if he was even kind of thinking about marrying me. I was in this for the long haul and I wanted to know where he stood. And my answer….”Kinda?” Deflate. I felt terrible. I felt that I had brought it up too early. He wasn’t ready. I was pushing him and I didn’t want him to feel pressured. I let the topic drop quickly—and I wasn’t going to bring it up any time soon. I’d wait for him.
On Monday, however, I had an email from the owner of the house telling me that she didn’t care that other girls had looked at it, she liked me and it was mine if I wanted it. Crap. So what did I do? I talked to Bryan. I felt like I was just adding logs to the fire of bugging him. I knew he didn’t want to hear about it, but I just felt that I couldn’t do anything without talking to him first. He told me to take some time to really considerate it and ask if I could wait until Wednesday. So I wrote the landlord and said I would get my application to her in a day or two.
Monday was such a funny day. Not only was I worried about housing, but I had to cook dinner for Dinner Group that night—which I hadn’t planned until at work—I was talking to Samantha about her boy problems, Jordan about his girlfriend, Lena about knowing when it’s the right guy and my ex, Trevor, who needed some uplifting words—surprising, I know. I didn’t know what was happening with my own life and I felt like everyone wanted me to be the guru of theirs. So what was my first reaction? I came home and told Bryan about everything. His advice….forget everything, don’t worry, start with getting dinner over with first and we’d worry about housing together later that week. That night Emily asked when I thought I’d marry Bryan. I told her I’d be lucky if he proposed before the end of the year.
On Saturday Emily had told me that she didn’t need a ride home from work on Monday or Tuesday. She had an Owlz baseball game and she was going to campus to work on some stuff for school. I was so proud that she was getting things worked out. Bryan thought it was a perfect time for us to go on one of the hikes we had talked about going on. Agreed. It was perfect cross training for our running. So we planned on 5:30 to go up Rock Canyon—might as well start with someplace we knew.
Tuesday. It was a normal day at work. I wanted it to be Friday, but I definitely wanted to get home to Bryan. He always makes my day better. I did promise my brother that I would call him though to hear about his girlfriend. So at 5:00 I called him. At 5:10 I heard my phone beep telling me I had a text message. I knew it was Bryan, who else would it be? But I knew we were hiking at 5:30 and so I didn’t respond. Our hike could wait until I finished with Jordan. At 5:20 Bryan called. He wanted to know where I was. I told him I was at home and talking to my brother. He sounded a little worried when he asked if it was going to take a long time. I told him no and that he should just come over and I’d be finished quicker if he was next to me. He came over and I had him say hi to Jordan—I had to talk to Jordan’s girlfriend, so I thought it was only fair that he did the same for me. Bryan kept it pretty short and I quickly said bye—Bryan seemed to be in a hurry to get hiking before dinner group started. Or so I thought.
When we got to Rock Canyon Bryan had my hand clinched like he used to when we had just started dating. I thought I was going to have to have another chat with him about relaxing his hand, but I didn’t think much more about it. He was also booking it up the canyon. I just assumed he wanted to get my heart rate up so that it would be a good work out, so he set the pace and I kept it. We chatted about something, I don’t remember what. I do remember mentioning that the water was gone from the stream when before it was overflowing. Finally we get to this big boulder. Bryan starts to slow down because we are catching up to two guys in front of us. They started to go toward the boulder and Bryan kind of shuffled his steps. I’m wondering what’s wrong. Nothing, just some slippery rocks. Agreed. Stupid rocks. Luckily the guys just glanced and turned away. We had been to these rocks before the last time we hiked Rock Canyon. Bryan mentioned how there was still some water trickling around the rocks. He said we should take a closer look. Okay.
He jumped onto the main rock. I was right behind him, but jumped away to another rock. I guess I wanted to explore. He called back to me. “Come back here.” I thought he just wanted to hug me or something so I willingly complied. Suddenly I felt the air become electrified and Bryan had this serious look on his face.
“Remember on Friday when you asked me if I was thinking of marrying you?”
“Yes.” Oh, crap, here it comes, he’s going to be angry and break up with me.
“Well, I wasn’t ready.”
Yep, nothing happening for a while. Hello single life for another year.
(fumbling around in his pocket) “Because…I didn’t have the ring yet.”
Shock.
Confusion.
(down on one knee) “Will you marry me?”
Heck yes!! “Yes.”
Kiss, kiss.(Unceremoniously grab ring and put on self) hug, kiss, kiss, hug, etc. “Emily is going to freak out.”
“Uh…..yeah, she’s known for the past 2 weeks.”
Shock.
Confusion.
Oh well. Kiss, kiss, hug, etc.
“Oh, by the way, we’re being videotaped.”
Shock.
Laugh.
Kiss, kiss, hug, etc Who cares? It’s my proposal.
Bryan's co-workers invited us to go tubing with them on Saturday. However, when the day came, it looked like a storm was heading our way. His friends decided to bail. We just thought, well, we're going to get wet anyway. So we hopped on some tubes and, low and behold, it rained for 2 minutes and then the sun came out and shined all the rest of the day. It didn't help my poor freezing body though. I think my feet went numb in 5 seconds, literally. Still, we had a blast, trying to get each other wet and not hitting the branches on both sides of the river. Might I add here that Bryan has started to get me to run everyday and we make sure and stretch after, so I'm getting pretty limber and was able to fold myself into a ball inside the tube and not hit the branches. I felt very cool.
